Home-work

Lola was busy dreaming about what presents she would get when she woke up. Then it happened. She woke up. She then turned round and reached for her glasses when she realised they weren’t there. Why? This made her peer in her nightie pocket.Her contacts were there. She put them in while her watch said 2:28am. “Not another one of Danny’s tricks.” She mumbled, bewildered. Soon after that she realised she was in a car boot. Her dad’s mercedes boot was green.  Fat tears rolled down her cheeks silently. She had been kidnapped on the morning of her birthday!

0

3 thoughts on “Home-work

  1. Oh Yasmin, poor Lola! I really like your choice of verbs like ‘peered’ and ‘mumbled’. Great use of the word ‘bewildered’ too. I also like the way you have used a very short sentence (‘Why?’) to add effect.

    I wonder if next time you could think more carefully about some of your sentence openings as you use the word ‘she’ quite a lot. What else could you use or put in front of ‘she’ to vary the way your sentences start?

    0

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *